Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Thoughts on Suicide

Here is my whole suicide diatribe, originally posted on facebook after a friend who frequently threatens suicide jumped off line after I told her she needed help that I could not give. Over my lifetime I've seen a lot of people threaten suicide, I've tried my best to help them as well as I could. Things are different now though. I'm older, sadder, and some days only the responsibilities I have to others keeps me alive.  This, sadly, is the best advice I can offer any more.
When did I become this cold? This ill? I used to fight harder, shout louder and stomp my feet with more resounding success. Now I barely even care. It comes down to this. If you are considering suicide REALLY and TRULY considering suicide do it. Don't struggle or cry out for attention, be a selfish bastard or bitch and end your fucking life, leave a note if you must.
                   If you have listened to me before and if you value your life and the light you bring into other's lives, then get the professional help you need. There are hotlines out there to call and people out there who can help you, really professionally help you. I can't. I'm not a doctor or a psychiatrist, I'm only a man who can only offer the same thing I've told you time and time again.

        If you have listened to me before however and value your life, seek help. There are people who can help you, professionals who know what you are going through and who are trained to get you through whatever it is that's eating you.
        I can't help you any more. I can barely keep myself alive. I'm doing everything I can to make it to the next day and sometimes even I fail. Get help. It is out there, if you value your life and the light it brings to others, get help, I beg this of you.
              If you are REALLY that tired however, really THAT fucking beat down, then have the fortitude to do it quietly at least. Stop trying to make it my fault. 
                   You're a good person, no matter who you are, if you are my friend you are valuable and deserve light love and happiness. It is out there, but it isn't easy to get. Suicide is selfish,and frankly stupid. It ends all hope and it does not create the kind of hurting sorrow most believe it does.
                     Please consider getting help. If you won't then please go silently into that good night, thank-you. 

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